Angelika Alana
EPISODE 114
“Ultimately we get to a space where sex can become an opportunity for self actualization, where we can heal, reenact in a safe way, potentially reclaim traumatic events and eroticized them and heal through them, where we can experience ourselves beyond our body.”
In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess connects with Angelika Alana Drake, a guide to relational and erotic intelligence. Their discussion revolves around daily practices of inner self-devotion and their impact on inner energetic levels. Angelika delves into how we perceive sex and the types of attachments we form. She explains that as we reach certain levels of understanding, we can approach sex in more emotionally connected ways. Angelika also explores how sex can facilitate healing from sexual trauma and the concept of sexual self-actualization. The conversation touches upon the idea of erotic innocence and how our fears influence our parenting. They also delve into the significance of committing to intimacy and the importance of prioritizing sex within relationships.
In this Episode of Open Late:
Daily Devotion and Unlocking Your Inner Mastery
Healing Through Sexual Self-Actualization
Exploring Erotic Innocence
Prioritizing sex and a Commitment to Intimacy
Finding power and Unleashing Female Strength without risk
Connect with Angelika Alana Drake:
• Instagram: @angelikaalana
• Website: https://www.angelikaalana.com/
• Podcast:Awakened Love: https://www.podpage.com/awakened-love/
Connect with Jessica:
• Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast
• Website: openlatepodcast.com
• YouTube: Open Late Podcast
• What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz
• Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp
1:41 I just felt like you had this calmness to you, this centeredness that nothing could really throw you off. - Jessica Esfandiary
4:21 I really do believe that every single human is capable of actualizing their fullest energetic potential through devotion to practice. -Angelika Drake
5:12 We have the fundamental basic physical needs for safety and security, and then we move into emotional needs and then a sense of belonging and significance. Then we move up, up, up until we get to that tip of the triangle, which is self-actualization. - Angelika Drake
6:19 Sex is an attachment behavior. We are mammals. We forget that. We like to think that we're separate from nature. - Angelika Drake
6:53 When we were cavemen, we wanted to secure and exchange resources to share the burden of survival with one another. And sex is a part of fortifying that attachment. So once that need is met, we're going to move into using sex for more emotional reasons. - Angelika Drake
8:00 Ultimately we get to a space where sex can become an opportunity for self actualization, where we can grow, go beyond ourselves, where we can heal, reenact in a safe way, potentially reclaim traumatic events and eroticized them and heal through them, where we can experience ourselves beyond our body. - Angelika Drake
8:48. The wealth of self-actualization is unending, if we show up to that experience with curiosity. - Angelika Drake
10:24 If we have a commitment that sex is important to us in the same way that meditation is important to us, that eating well is important to us. If we decide that as an individual and as a couple, we prioritize this. That means that every time I sit down on the meditation pillow, I don't always want to meditate, but I do it every morning and I have done so for the last ten years. Every time I lift weights. I don't always want to lift weights, but there's never been a single time where I've said, “Man, I wish I didn't meditate, lift weights or have sex with my husband.” - Angelika Drake
11:36 It's interesting to look at sex in a strategic way, the same way we would a devotional spiritual practice. It's the business of health. - Jessica Esfandiary
15:52 You cannot have deep access without safety. You will not be experiencing self-actualization if you are trying to skip ahead. - Angelika Drake
16:38 Every time you feel that that need is compromised, you must circle back, and restore so that you can include and transcend. - Angelika Drake
18:45 We're all born erotic, we're animals. Little kids hump pillows and find pleasure in whatever way possible. We don't associate that pleasure with specific humans or even body parts yet, because that's just not part of our programing. We're just in what I would call erotic innocence. - Angelika Drake
19:30 If a kid is masturbating in public, we do want to give them social programming, that isn't what we do. It's not a safe or appropriate thing to do, but without shaming them, that act itself or that they themselves are somehow wrong or bad. Being able to talk about safe spaces and safety and that you can touch anywhere on your own body, but no one else should touch your body, And if an adult ever touches your body, you come to me and you can tell me and you will never get in trouble. - Angelika Drake
23:00 Purity is a trap. Purity is not just all good and all light. Purity is wholeness and wholeness includes and transcends to get to pure light. We include all colors, all experiences in the whole - That's wholeness. It's an inclusion and a sense of connection. But in order to be connected to these parts of ourselves, they have to be in our conscious awareness. - Angelika Drake
28:45 There is no more powerful energy on this planet than the erotic charge of desire. Desire is the arrow of our soul that points. - Angelika Drake
29:30 If we're not celebrating, worshiping, aligning with praying to life, love in full expression, then what the fuck are we doing? What's the point in spiritual practice? It's dead, it's hollow, it's empty. We're bypassing. - Angelika Drake
30:00 The more in touch with our primal, fallible, messy human we are, the more trustworthy we are, the more in touch with our erotic impulses and urges we are, the less likely we're going to inflict harm on ourselves or others with them. - Angelika Drake
35:18 We live in a society where our bodies are the problem. Women as they're starting to develop, it's like, oh, that we have to cover that up. Pull your skirt down and don't touch it. And it's going to cause a problem and it's going to get you hurt. -Jessica Esfandiary
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